For Four-Four

I've been thinking about lists.  Mental lists, list of things to do, lists of pros and cons to assist in making a decision...you know, lists.  I once worked with a woman who was a dedicated list maker.  I'm sure she felt that having a tangible list of things to do helped to keep her life in order, but, she still seemed pretty stressed out to me.  When I looked a little more closely at her list I realized that she was never "completing" a list.  Instead, as she crossed items off the top of her list, she would add additional tasks to the bottom of the list, thus creating a perpetual list and never garnering a sense of completion or accomplishment.  Well, that was enough to dissuade me from getting involved with list making other than for Christmas and vacation packing. Until now, that is. I've noticed a trend towards making lists of things to do, be it during a particular year of life or simply prior to the end of one's life.  I'm all about looking forward and making plans for the future, but somehow making that sort of list doesn't appeal to me - perhaps a lack of ambition on my part?  And, while I'm not one to reside in the past, I'd rather make a list of things I already have accomplished in recognition of my 44 years worth of living.  Bear with me - this is completely self-indulgent.  They are in no particular order.

1. Put myself through college - and graduate school, completely on my own.
2. Watched the sun rise over the Atlantic numerous times.
3. Had letters to the editor expressing my opinion(s) published
4. Nurtured and grew children in my body
5. Had cancer removed from my body twice
6. Lived in NYC
7. Survived without a television - or a car, for numerous years
8. Swam in the Mediterranean.
9. Volunteered.
10. Mastered hollandaise.
11. Ridden my bicycle for 50+ miles.
12. Been to the beach every summer for the last 12 years.
13. Found my father's family. 
14. Visited the birthplaces of both of my parents.
15. Hitchhiked around Europe.
16. Saw a bald eagle and her eaglets in thier nest while sea-kayaking around Orcas Island.
17. Ate at the French Laundry.
18. Learned how to live without credit card debt.
19. Received tenure - 3 times.
20. Birthed babies, both surgically and without drugs.  Prefer the latter.
21. Had my heart broken. 
22. Broke some hearts.
23. Had a trans-Atlantic romance.
24. Maintained friendships with people despite time and distance.
25. Visited the USSR before the Wall fell.
26. Saw my candidate get elected to the White House - twice.
27. Created a home for my family.
28. Lived alone in complete contentment.
29. Took a chance on a person.
30. Convinced someone to take a chance on me.
31. Maintained a marriage for 16+ years.
32. Rode my bicycle around Greenwood Lake.  A long ride in memories, not necessarily miles.
33. Learned how to apologize with sincerity.
34. Laughed until I leaked fluid.  Use your imagination.
35. Went to the desert, unfortunately not on a horse with no name.
36. Saw more concerts than I can count.
37. Met celebrities and treated them like human beings.
38. Drank a perfect bellini.
39. Walked around a vineyard with a winemaker and learned how much science + art goes in each bottle.
40. Experienced being robbed and having my house burn down - survived both.
41. Came to truly understand that life is all about choices.
42. Accepted that living in the moment will probably always be a struggle for me.
43. Can still do a kick-ass cartwheel.
44. Became the person I am because of all of these things and more.